It has been proven that mediation leads to less conflict in the long term. It is because of the way the legal system works – each wins a case by “proving” they are right and the other wrong. Or worse, winning by highlighting only the negatives of a once happy relationship or person you loved, in order to “win”. Unfortunately, a “win” at Court is often a “loss” for the future wellbeing of the whole separated family as hurts from the Court process linger.
Lots of separated couples have an awareness that going to Court or using lawyers is going to be an expensive waste of money, but sadly end up going down the legal path when they find trying to negotiate amongst themselves, or when getting a close friend or family member to “mediate” just doesn’t work.
It is compulsory to try mediation before you go to Court to argue about parenting matters, and you might find your lawyer or the Court referring you to mediation, also called Family Dispute Resolution Mediation, or FDR, isn’t compulsory in property matters but it’s growing quickly as the most cost-effective choice for couples splitting up their assets.
Coming to mediation allows you to negotiate with your ex-partner in a voluntary, safe, professional and neutral environment. Things you try and say to each other alone seem to end up causing fights – somehow saying the same thing with a mediator keeps things calmer, and more constructive.
Too many couples miss the mediation step and when negotiating through lawyers doesn’t work, find themselves in Court, faced with a non-negotiable decision by a judge that feels unfair or disempowering. Despite how upset and angry you may feel when starting the Court battle, it never feels good down the track when tens of thousands of dollars have been spent and hurtful things have been (repeatedly) said.
Just like Court, is unrealistic to think you will get everything your way in mediation. What you WILL get out of mediation is that you choose a compromised position that you can live with.
If you aren’t happy with the outcome – you end the process, as mediation is voluntary. You can always choose the Court pathway if you can’t find an outcome at mediation that you are comfortable with – but in all honesty, with the majority of our clients we find that rarely happens.
So why are we a better alternative than Court?
- Immediate appointments – no long waiting lists (as is the case with some big agencies). No waiting around for months on end to be seen. We give you the opportunity to get results and wrap up your case weeks or months sooner than with many of the agencies
- Years of training and knowledge – trained to work in the Australian Family Law System, Janine understands the family law processes involved and is authorised to issue s60i certificates (if you end up needing one for Court)
- Neutrality – renowned for being down-to-earth, practical, yet sensitive to your emotions; as a relationship counsellor and mediator, Janine’s understanding of how relationships work, and break-down, allows her to view your situation from both points of view, without being swayed. Instead you can benefit from her ability to negotiate the situation unbiasedly and fairly. And it’s important to note: years of experience means she’s not biased – it really does not matter whose story Janine gets to hear first
- Financial qualifications – Janine is not only a relationship counsellor and mediator. With a commerce degree and a first career in the business world, she understands real life and complex financial matters, enabling you to quickly resolve property and financial disputes without having to hire an additional party
- Experience in the family law system – Janine has mediated hundreds of cases and writes easy-to-read and clear mediation agreements that you can take away for yourself or hand to you lawyers; She will also run lawyer-assisted mediations, in situations where you would like an advocate to be present. Lawyers do not have a voice at the table, but can be great to have on hand for advice during private breakouts
- Video Conferencing and Electronic Whiteboard – mediate effectively with a partner who does not live in Canberra or who does want to mediate in the same room. Have copies of your agreements in Microsoft Word and Excel read to edit or email on to other parties
- Voluntary and safe: mediate together or at a distance – whether you feel more comfortable being in the same room, or safer being separated in separate rooms or with one of you on the phone or videoconferencing, mediation makes it possible for you to have your voice heard, and empowers you to make constructive input into shaping your own future. If you are unhappy with how the process is going, you can terminate it without having to pay anyone else’s expensive legal costs
- Empowerment – you are the one who has to live with decisions made, so don’t let lawyers or a judge decide what happens with your future. Remember, plans made in mediation can be much more detailed. For example, in parenting orders made by the Court, orders may only outline basic dates and times, however you may find that afterwards there is still room for disagreement over the finer details
- More chance of avoiding long term conflict – It has been proven that mediation leads to less conflict in the long term. It is because of the way the legal system works – each wins a case by “proving” they are right and the other wrong. Or worse, winning by highlighting only the negatives of a once happy relationship or person you loved, in order to “win”. Unfortunately, a “win” at Court is often a “loss” for the future wellbeing of the whole separated family as hurts from the Court process linger
- Confidentiality – the family law regulations provide strict guidelines about the confidentiality and admissibility of things said at mediation – unfortunately only accredited FDRPs receive these protections. Non-accredited mediators, counsellors and psychologists do not offer you the same confidentiality protections that that a FDRP can
- Come back to mediation whenever you like – and at a fraction of the cost of returning to Court or lawyers. Clients find that once they have been to mediation with us, they are happy to come back and sort out any future problems as they begin, before they get out of hand
- Child-informed mediation – Janine is trained in child informed mediation and uses it where necessary – judiciously and carefully – to offer your children the chance to speak out about their future, their wants and their needs, free from pressure. Melanie Sheehan, Psychologist and Family Therapist, also provides Child Sessions at our centre for mediations
- Modern, comfortable and well located office in Manuka
- Contact us to arrange your pre-mediation individual session